Confession:

Contrary to popular belief,
I genuinely would not want to be famous ...
Successful --> for sure
Famous --> not so much

There's absolutely no denying that I've thought about it
(Come on, everyone's guilty of that!)

But in all honesty,
shortly after I think even about the idea of achieving fame,
my face turns a shade of sunburst that is highly unattractive
and I get a hive (just one, but a hive nonetheless)

I very much like my life just the way it is :)

But I must confess,
when Kate Winslet won her Oscar on Sunday,
and announced that she'd
"be lying to say she hadn't made a version of this speech before,
and practiced it into the mirror with a shampoo bottle"
I cracked up and nodded in agreement ...

Because I'd be lying to say that there wasn't a night when
(after we'd enjoyed a few too many)
I stood up on our coffee table,
thanked Alyssa
and the Academy (of course) for voting for me
and then blurted my acceptance speech
while holding my "Oscar"
... better known as, a Coors Light bottle

Can't quite remember what I said,
but I'm "positively sure"
it was award winning ;)

Jessica & Mike's Wedding :)

Is it humanly possible to have too much fun?!

Because I have to admit,
I'm still not entirely recovered
from the awesomeness of this past weekend.

When I regain full consciousness
and can conjure up the words,
there will be a whole lot more written
about this absolutely ah!mazing wedding ...
Stay tuned!

To the new Mr. & Mrs. Goff ...
CONGRATULATIONS!!

Xoxoxoxoxoxo :)

Here are some pix in the meantime:

Happy Friday!

Off to San Diego for Jessica & Mike's wedding :)

Pix (and stories, no doubt) to follow on Monday

In the meantime,
wherever you may be,
stay warm!!

Happy Friday and have a wonderful weekend :)

You Know I’m Lying When You Hear Me Say

"Wow, I don't usually talk this much!"

"I swear I don't usually drink this much!"

"Seriously, do I have tapeworm? I honestly never eat this much"

"Is it already 4am?!? Yikes, I never stay out this late!"

"Your little tiny dog is adorable … I want one!"

"You should come over for dinner … I cook!"

"Coffee doesn't usually make me this wired …"

"I promise I'm not normally so late, it's just that the subway …"

"I just love getting dressed up!"

"This new diet I'm on is awesome!"

"Yep, I've worked out every day this week"

"I'm not usually this competitive on Board Game night … Don't know what's gotten into me."

"I'm really good with money. A penny saved is a penny earned!"

"I think I'll be a great mom someday ... I just wanna have litters of babies!"

"Ya, me too, I rarely ever drink alone …"

"Ya, sex is so overrated."

Pancakes! Pancakes for Breakfast ...

and lunch and dinner ...
and brunch and linner ...

You get the point :)

If you live in New York,
don't miss Clinton Street Baking Company this month ...
the food orgasm is worth the wait! ;)

Too Funny ...

Alyssa came home tonight and thought that the yellow rose pedals were bowls of potato chips ... Admittedly, I couldn't help but to die laughing when she mindlessly attempted to eat one!

Coming from someone who once ate a tulip bulb, I felt so badly that I did not forewarn her sooner that they were flowers :(

Because tulip bulbs taste like chalk.
And chalk tastes like dog biscuits.
And please just take my word for it, that I would not recommend eating any of the aforementioned "edibles"

(PS BTW, I would also highly recommend that if/when your best-friend-from-birth dares you to wear your dog's invisible-fence collar around your neck ... do not, repeat NOT,
do so and then run across the line ... Holy. Hell. Not. Good! No fun. Repeat: not fun whatsoever!)

Gnomes Gone Wild ;)

I may never look at Schwing and Blue the same way ever again!

Hahahaha ;)

Flower Power :)

A friend of mine gave me
a vase of yellow roses for Valentines Day
which was SO kind!

Problem being,
I swear to God that flowers take one look at me
and bite-the-big-one :(

So if you are anything like me,
and seriously lack a green thumb,
here's a way to make these nice gestures last a little longer :)

Literal People Crack My Shit Up!

Over the weekend I went to the Croxley Ale House with Alyssa, Lad & Lesley. Nothin' classier than four chicks casually downing cheap beers and even cheaper chicken wings ;)

I digress ...

We ordered the mild wings and let me tell ya, the small little container of blue cheese dressing didn't stand a chance against this little fatty.

So I said to the waitress, "Hey while we have you, can we also get a couple more sides of blue cheese and a handful of those wet-nap thingies?"

Mind you, there were four of us sitting at the table so I had to chuckle when the waitress brought back two containers of dressing and exactly five wet-naps.

I wondered if she really was that literal of a person, that a "couple" meant 2 so a handful obviously meant 5.

And for reasons unknown, I felt like I needed to know the answer. So the next time she came around I asked for a "few" more napkins and giggled to myself when she brought back exactly 3 of them.

This intrigued me! I couldn't help to zone out for a sec to wonder what life would be like with a mind like that ... What would it be like to be a literal person?

Does she wake up at the exact same time everyday?
Like, at exactly 7:53am?
(However I'd bet $ that she's an even number person)

Better yet, has she ever once used the snooze button?
Or would that throw off her day?!

I wondered how many would she have brought if I ordered "a bunch" or "a bundle" of something? Would she have asked me to clarify?

I laughed to myself wondering what this type of person would do if someone said to her, "Let's meet around 5ish" ... Would she still arrive right at 5? Lord knows I would not ;)

Then I took another sip of beer and my mind wandered back to our mild meal ... literally ;)

Confession of a Shopaholic:

Today I spent $4.25 on the following change purse


Hmmmmm,
Oxymoron much?!?

My One & Only Valentine ... Awwwesoommme ;)

There is seriously something wrong with my life ...

Check out the Valentine my mom sent me:

REPEAT:
This is my life ...
Wanna trade?!?!

HAPPY HAPPY VALENTINES DAY FRIENDS!

Xoxoxoxo

"Rogue Bridesmaid"

My "bm" dress arrived today for a wedding in t-minus 9 days ...

It fits!
It mean, it like really "fits"!
Yep, yep, yep ... it "fits like a glove" ... when I wear my fav hooded sweatshirt and floor-length sleeping bag style North Face coat underneath it!

(The sombrero, green boa, heart bag, and sassy shades are just an added bonus ;)

Hahahaha ...
Never a dull moment

With Wedding Season '09 Approaching ...

I find myself laughing daily at one of my all-time favorite pix

Allow me the pleasure to introduce you
to one of my all-time besties ...
"Duck-Duck-Cody"


Hahahaha
Gets me every time!
:)

I Heart Nick Mitchell / Norman Gentle :)

Hahahahaha ... LOVE it!

How Had I Never Known of This "Religion"?!?!

Let's talk about the
"Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster"
Shall we?



Call me a Pastafarian ...
I'm converting for sure!
;)

"Loreley" by Dustin Johnston

Never a shortage of good times :)

P.S.
A quick word to the wise:
If/when you go to the Loreley,
I highly recommend ordering a "big beer" ...
They will not disappoint ;)

Snow Scrapers

Red Bull hosted the Snow Scapers event at East River Park which is just a short walk from my apartment :)

Check out the highlights from the competition
and the crazy run they built for it ...
Awesomeness!

Not Normal ...

Last night I walked up the street to hang with my friend Liz (she is the Wine Director at Inoteca A.K.A the best job on the Planet)

So were sitting at the bar,
ketchin' up like tomatoes,
and in walks R.E.M ...
Craziness!

Admittedly, I'd had a few which only made the situation all the more surreal. But my favorite moment, hands down, was when "Day Sleeper" came on her iPod and she looked at me like a deer in head lights ... "Stace! Do you think I should I change the song? Oh God, this is so awkward!"

There was no way not to crack up at the ha!larity of the whole scenario ... I said, "Ummmm, well Lizzard, I can't say that I've ever been in this predicament before. Ya know, it's not every night that I'm sitting five feet from Michael Stipe while one of his hit singles randomly gets played on the shuffle ;) But I wouldn't change it. They should feel flattered!"

Hahahaha ... Soooo not normal

REPEAT: Someone Please Get Me a Muzzle!

Ufffff ...
It's official ...
Working alone has made me lose my marbles :(

Today I went to Earth Matters from 9-5 and set-up-shop in the upstairs internet cafe.

Circa 3pm, two peeps sat at the table directly next to me and the woman, ever so nonchalantly, started to interview the guy.

To say that I was eavesdropping would be the understatement of the year. I honestly couldn't help myself. My 3rd child syndrome kicked into overdrive and my undiagnosed A.D.D was at it's worst.

It had nearly been a whole day since I'd had a real face-to-face conversation with a real human ...

So when the woman asked the man,
"What would you say is one of your best qualities?"

And he replied,
"Well, I guess you could say that I play fair in the sandbox."

I nearly jumped off my seat when I blurted out,
"Ha! Me too!!"

You could hear crickets ...

Literally, everyone in the cafe was witness to my impulsive, spastic outburst and I couldn't help but to laugh.

Omg, who does that??

There are very few times in life that I admit to being embarrassed ... this was most definitely one of them!

Had there been an actual sandbox present, I would have dug a hole to China and crawled deep down inside it.

Seriously, what is wrong with me???
Stacey, NO ONE CALLED ON YOU!!
STOP FLYING YOUR FREAK FLAG!!

Once my face returned to a normal shade of flush, I apologized profusely for my needless/totally rude interruption.

But, if it's any consolation, I really do love the phrase "I play nice in the sandbox" and I very much hope that that guy gets the job ... Personally, I would've hired him just for saying that :)

I LEGO NYC :)

This is a great article ... Enjoy!

Over the Weekend ...

We saw the Googly-Goog-Getaway-Car
But no such luck seeing the Googly-Goog-Bandit :(

Rats!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BLOG!

365 posts in 365 days ...
Wo!

For those of you who have been loyal friends
to my main man, Mr. Z Do Da ...
Thanks!

Cheers to another great year in the blogosphere :)