Sunday, August 17, 2008

Thoughts on Ketchup Bottles


Dear Heinz 57,


Can you please get your shit together?!?!

I mean it, really!

There is not an American on this planet,
that hasn't struggled with your thin neck bottle ...
Beating each side silly,
until that artificial awesomeness comes a flowin'


So, you go ahead and invent the wide neck bottle,
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand ...


People!

There HAS to be a happy medium here!

I love squeeze bottles,


P.S.

How's Teresa doing?!?


I haven't seen or heard from her
since John Kerry got the screw job in the '04 election :(

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